Campus Students, This Is How To Know That You Are Cursed

By B. O. B

You get HELB loan and spend it ruthlessly on a first year lady who is on parallel. Now, this first year happens to rule you so much that you forget that sossi was once meat to you. You maliciously buy for her an expensive Samsung touch screen phone with 800MB data bundles. As your HELB begins to reduce, you start picking coca cola bottle tops for free internet bundles to help you keep watsapping this unquenchable volcanically romantic lady only for her to abandon you when the semester ends. Your HELB has now been reduced to HELP. You didn’t even remember to send your mother airtime. Your mother’s phone is some useless Zhin Xhuen East Beijing manufactured phone with a pregnant battery fastened by a bladder. Your mother’s phone has no : power, airtime, watsapp or even a please call me text leave alone an okoa jahazi. Her phone only has network by the service provider. My friend, you have been cursed by your villagers.

The end of semester exams are around the corner yet this is the time you discover how sweet marijuana is with chapatis and cold water fetched from the bathroom shower tap. Then you smoke and enter you room, you take your room mates speakers and laptop and dip them into a bucket full of cold water so that you listen to cool music. You are arrested and taken to the school’s security department and locked in the school’s cell. You end up missing the week one exams. My friend let me tell you that your village elder cursed you while he was listening to the reggae song called, “Ganja Farmer.” Are we together on this?

During the exam period, you decide to want to have sex ceremoniously but unfortunately you are caught. And it is not the first time you are are being caught especially during exam periods. Now this time you are caught by the lady’s boyfriend who happens to be a bouncer. This guy ends up beating the bone of your nose until you get marasmus of the nostrils.You decide all is not lost, you get another lady, you buy her black ice, king fisher and buy yourself glucose and some energy drinks for your supposed work ahead. Unfortunately for you, all students in the school decide to go on a rampage and your dreams of a consolation sex are cut short. My friend let me tell you that cursed you to read only and never have sex while still a student.

As the exams go on, you get yourself a new campus girlfriend. But immediately, the daughter of your village chief who apparently is your ex girlfriend, calls you and tells you that she still loves you the way his father loves to be given free chicken by wrong doers in the village. You get so confused and excited by this call until you send her money for pedicure and manicure yet she has no nails on her feet. So you end up ditching this very descent and bright campus lady for that idiotic chief’s daughter. Let me tell you my friend that your village elders cursed you by dancing naked around a pot of boiling chicken feathers making sure that you are permanently in a romantic tower of babel with this idiotic daughter of your chief who can’t even differentiate between what digit comes firstin the number twenty two.

Still you survive and the semester comes to a close and it’s time to go see your village folks. You want to arrive in the evening because you are the village hero. On your arrival, you are intercepted by some wicked village thieves who apparently steal even food. These thieves also happen to be the suppliers of that deadly marijuana that you smoke mercilessly in campus so I bet you can guess the sizes of their eyes and the pH scale of the color of their eyes.These thieves demand you to surrender your phone and money. You obviously deny and say that you have no phone or money then immediately, your untamed phone rings so loudly and unfortunately your ringtone is, “You can chop my money, chop my money, coz I don’t care,” and the thugs give you a Jackie Chaaan, ‘Achaaa!’.

After the thugs beating, your eyes are so swollen but you arrive home safely. The kerosene in your lamp is finished. You fumble in the dark to get an eye drop medicine to heal your poo eye. Unfortunately, you mistake superglue for the eye drop.

You go to a hospital and your eye is treated. Then the doctor tells you that in order for your bad luck to come to an end, then you must have sex with the chief’s daughter. On your planned day of romping the chief’s daughter, you get with her in bed and she suddenly turns into a coffin.

The next Sunday, you get saved and get an internship in Somalia. On your first day of internship, you enter an elevator, then some Al Shabaab militia enter the same elevator and because you are now saved, your phone rings so loudly and the ringtone is, “Somebody shout Hallelujah!”… I leave you to fantasize on this not so rosy experience.

You get from Somalia back home then you find that the chief’s daughter bought you a new belt as a surprise valentine’s present. So the next day when wearing your trouser, the new belt turns into a snake. Fine you get a Chinese girlfriend who cooks you the belt and you both enjoy the yummy yummy belt.

On the day of your first date with your Chinese girlfriend, you decide to take her to a Chinese restaurant. After eating three bowls of Chin Hua roasts, you realize that you forgot your wallet in the taxi. Apparently, this hotel is owned by Jet Li. I can’t comment on the outcome of forgetting your wallet in this karateful hotel.

All the above symptoms tell you that the person who cursed you died a long time ago. Because of this, there is no medicine to reverse the situation. So remain cursed my friend because the more your curses, then the more I get the material to write about.

LMC Student Passes On

By Clive Olero

Moi University has lost yet another comrade. Josephine Adhiambo Okoth, Registration Number: LMC/ 01/ 15 a first year student in the school of Arts and Social Sciences taking Linguistics media and communication passed on at Jaramogi Oginga Odinga Teaching and Referral Hospital.

Josephine was first diagnosed with anemia while in Form Two. Jay (as she was commonly known by her friends) had been transferred from Moi Teaching and Referral Hospital for further treatment in Kisumu. Josephine is believed to have succumbed to acute and rare combination of anemia, chronic ulcers and heart spleen problem. She breathed her last on Tuesday at around 3 o’clock in the morning.

Jay was charming and a great friend who has gone too soon-Jay’s former roommate Sharon( Shish)

Despite working hard to make it to the University, Jay never had a chance to attend a single lecture. Jay took more than a month at Moi Teaching and Referral Hospital but with the advice of the doctor who was attending to her she was referred to Jaramogi Oginga Odinga Referral Hosptial (Russia) in Kisumu, a place near her home. Jay was third born in a family of four.

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Pic: The Late Josephine Adhiambo Okoth

The demise of Josephine brings the number of comrades who have passed on this month to three. It comes barely a week after comrades’ sent- off Obilo K’Obilo, a student who died two weeks after graduation. Jay was a resident of Hostel E .

On behalf of our esteemed readers, the Legacy Publication sends heartfelt condolences to the family, relatives and friends of Josephine during these tough moments. May the Almighty strengthen and comfort you.

 

Caroline Mutoko to visit Moi University

By Ronald McAgak

Former Kiss 100 presenter, Caroline Mutoko is set to visit Moi University on 19th November this year. Mutoko will be hosted by the School of Information Sciences where she will be the chief guest speakerin a public Lecture that will be held at LT 1. The public Lecture that has been organized by the Department of Publishing and Media studies with the help of Dr. Duncan Omangawill kick off as from 9.00am.. The public lecture has been themed Radio Dialogues 2014; Radio in Africa Trends and Contexts

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Other guests who will also grace the lecture include Prof. C.J Odhiambo and Reuben Kigame of Fish FM. With the vast experience Mutokohas in radio, a lot is expected to be delivered by her to the audience.Dr. Duncan Omanga has said that despite the fact that the lecture will be held at the school of Information Sciences, students from all schools are welcomed to attend.

Life’s Testimony; Battle With Sickle Cell Anaemia.

By Lukunga Berryl

To wake up in the morning is so obvious to most of us, it’s just about opening the eye and stretching out your hands to reach for your phone, but to me it’s a miracle. Just when am done with a night’s dream and I open my eyes to see another day, mine heart is speckled with traces of joy and gloom especially with the tormenting knowledge of hosting the sickled-cells in my blood stream.

Sickle cell anemia is a genetically inherited condition in which the red blood cell, which transports the oxygenated blood is deprived of its large surface area and therefore, not enough of this essential gas is fed to the body. Sadly, there is no permanent cure for this life threatening condition, save for some drugs that are used to keep the pain that it spits at bay.

As a young innocent but vibrant girl, I grew up with completely no knowledge of this giant in my life. I was a victim of joint pains that kept me out of school for so long. My mum though, seemed to be aware of it all but kept it away from me. She was persistent in seeking a cure at any cost but all was in vain. In all this she prescribed her love to me,and she never moved an inch away from me. Thank God for her special love.

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Sometimes I sit down to reflect the far I have come because of God’s love. Tears of joy wash my otherwise frowned face when I get the reality of the victory that He has granted over this demeaning challenge. I hear of stories of those who die prematurely of this this disease. Young children, young boys and girls are called to glory just at the peak of their development, just when life is picking its real sense. And when the rainy season comes, the cold triggers the clogging of blood and the veins are blocked. What follows is an acute pain in the joints, the doctor tells me its ‘sickle cell crises’ and the dispensary beds has to be become my home.

But well, thank God for the gift of hope that He has planted in me. The hope and the belief that my life has a purpose that I must achieve. The pain has instead shaped me to endure the huddles that come my way. I just look past any challenge with hope of better tomorrow and trusting in God that my destiny is preserved beyond any challenge. Sometimes I feel like it is taking too long but I know it will take patience, I have to keep clinging to the cross for my God is not asleep.

This has been my life. So much I cannot do because of this. But do you realize how blessed and lucky you are? How I wish I had your flexibility, your freedom and health. What value have you added to your life given that God granted opportunity to be free? Remember it is not for granted that you are where you are, perhaps you have a purpose that you have never realized and it is best you go after it.

Are We Worth Proposals? (Part 2)

By Alal K’Alal

Ours is a society of wonders; some things that happen in our lives are laughable, good and bad. Moi University is not exceptional. The politics of today in Main campus, as Obilo noted earlier about democratic space, has shifted from the intellects to toddlers. The 28th SGC has more toddlers than ‘mature animals’ who never cease to amaze from the way they deliver their duties to the way some of them conduct themselves. I’m told most of them are confused even after they attended an induction ceremony at the coast.

Last week, a story ran of a director who had allegedly been assaulted by some students next to the students’ center on Thursday night for failure to pay them their ‘wages’. The students are said to have cleaned hostel J and H on Saturday 25thbut had not received money from the Health director, Jemima Tietie.

According to one of the students who were involved in the deal, Peter Agoro, the director had received 85,500/- from the MUSO kitty for having done a one-day shoddy clean-up in the two hostels. The director then shared the money amongst two groups. One group of students received 50,000/- while Tietie pocketed 35,500/-.

The question students continue to ask is whether it was necessary for the Dean of students to approve such a huge amount for some myopic hungry members of Jo-Ath at the expense of needy students. The money that to date has brought a lot of tension in Main campus was earned with much sttruggle by our parents. Yes, the money came from 171 students who, perhaps, made their families sleep hungry so that they could not miss their examinations.

Are there no casual workers who were mandated to undertake the job? Evidently, very many casual cleaners attend to their duties daily and perfectly without failure. They are paid monthly salaries by the University; unfortunately, they are not paid 85,500/= for a day’s work. The administration cannot afford to pay them 15,000/= per month. The approval of the proposal has not only revealed the extent to which comrades’ subscription fee is embezzled but also the need to detach subscription fee from the tuition fee.

According to Agoro, part of the proposal stated that it was supposed to be ‘voluntary’ and targeted two hundred students to participate. How voluntary was a job whose expenditure was 85,500/=? How could the Health director award three students (names still withheld for the next publication) fifty thousand? Any sane man would agree with me that students are forced to subscribe so that directors find money to award their sycophants.

There is no doubt that if sanity were to be regained in the Health docket of this University, Jemima Tietie should be impeached on grounds of gross incompetence and mismanagement of funds. Moreover, the students who were involved should be barred from writing any other proposals forthwith. The money that the students squandered should also be returned to the Kitty for other better projects.

In the future, a committee should be formed to oversee the whole process and act as watch dogs in order to allow for transparency. It is needless to force students to pay five hundred if, for example, the kitty can only provide fifty thousand when a student dies and pay fifty thousand to students who voluntarily cleaned two hostels for less than two hours.

Obilo’s Final Send-Off

By ALAL K’Alal

Livinstone Otieno Obilo was laid to rest on Saturday in his rural home in Migori two weeks after he lost his life in a grisly accident in Nairobi. Over fifty students from Moi University Main Campus travelled and witnessed the final journey of Kobilo.

Seth Odongo (Dikembe Disembe), eulogized Obilo as a brave man who remained true to his words and was always committed to his work. Moreover, he appreciated the love Obilo had for education and stated that Obilo also had good friends.

The immediate former MUSO prime director noted that Obilo was a freedom fighter, a harsh critic incompetent student leaders and a man who always condemned the status quo. Bush note that while some students said that Obilo had failed the objectivity test, he still had the authority to influence their way of thinking.

Mwamburi Mwambeo Mwang’ombe, the chairperson of the 26th SGC, remembered Obilo for his support for him during campaign times. Then, according to Mwamburi, Obilo broke the boundaries of tribalism and supported him; a man from the minority.

The 26th SGC secretary general, Okeri, also lamented the death terming it untimely and sad. He remembered back in 2010when he rejoined Moi from a suspension and met two young and descent boys; Obilo and Dikembe. According to him, he introduced the duo into campus politics and taught them how they could remain relevant.

The current MUSO chairperson, Geoffrey Omondi, eulogized Obilo as a great brain who fought and spoke on behalf of the weak.

He lamented the demise of Obilo as one of the biggest lost Kenya has ever incurred. Omondi also presented a condolence letter from the head of department, communication, Dr. Ong’ondo, where they expressed their heartfelt condolences for the untimely demise.

One of Obilo’s friends, Omollo Komwandho, also lamented the death terming it ‘tough to believe.’ Omollo narrated his last encounter with Obilo on the evening before Obilo passed on. He said that Obilo called him to confirm his plans for the weekend and when he said he had none, Obilo sent him 1,600/-. Later he bought a bottle of Guinness but was unable to drink it at that time. Further, Omollo narrated his dream at night where Obilo bid him Good bye.

Obilo’s father, while eulogizing his son, thanked God for the life he had live with him and having given birth to him. In his painful remarks, he noted that life had not be easy for him after he lost his wife barely a year ago. According to the family, the death of Kobilo had made him lose hope in life since he is also elderly

Choose Dignity

By OLGA Omondi

It all starts in nursery school, where you go to school, as young innocent souls, our teachers, parents and guardians want the best for us. Yes, we all go to school to get education and train in different fields everyone prove to be ambitious with wonderful visions and dreams of serving people in different ways.

We all want to earn a living and live lavishly. Yes, we are advised to work hard and achieve our goals in life but what worries me most is what the world has become into, you attain your degree after working so hard during your schooling, they may say a degree is no longer important but sure there is no level of education that will ever be useless.

Education is meant to change our lives and it Is the ultimate key to a better life, without any single knowledge in an area no one would be able to progress, we all need that slight knowledge to keep on succeeding.

Searching for job after University has become hectic, we are subjected to “tarmacking”, in order to eliminate this, we need to be aggressive and utilize every single opportunity we get, be it the curriculum activities: games and sports, being active in clubs all these will make us realize our capabilities in various fields..

Let’s not lower our dignity for the sake of job opportunity, walk with your head so high because you are wonderfully made by God, don’t ever allow yourself to be abused at the expense of a job however desperate you might be, respect yourself first and respect will follow you.

Be a people of substance. Never lower your dignity for the sake of a job. This will create disrespect to you as well as fighting guilt, which is the most cumbersome war to fight..If you tend not to be lucky in the field of employment, open your eyes and mind. Be innovative, look for a gap in the society and achieve self-employment, many people have made it in history without necessarily being employed; you can be your own boss. Keep your hopes high and be optimistic. Choose dignity choose success.